My Dearest Alexander Blake, On Your First Birthday
I know I’m suppose to be grateful you’ve been blessed a year older–and I am–but I can’t help but cling on to this fleeting time with you as an infant.
I want to remember…
How your brown eyes greet mine every morning when there’s not yet light peering through the curtain…
How you scrunch your little nose because you know it will make me laugh…
How your sweet little voice sounds, right before you fall asleep…
How your tiny fingers grasp my thumb as you nurse and stare at me with wonder…
At first I thought you were looking at me for guidance, but now I believe it is me that is finding answers through you.
You have taught me…
That, despite my best efforts, time doesn’t slow down so I need to live in the moment…
That snuggling on the sofa is more important than making sure dinner is on the table on time…
That listening to birds chirp is more important than waiting for a phone to chime…
That reading “one more book” is more important than folding “one more basket” of laundry.
Son, I will be there for you with a bandage when you fall off your skateboard, and I will be there with an emotional bandage when you go through your first break-up. I’ll be waiting by the door to pick you up from your first day of school, and I’ll be waiting by the door when you come home late for curfew. I’ll stand by you when you embarrass me with an epic meltdown in the middle of the store, and I’ll stand by you to embarrass you with hugs and kisses in public until the day I die.
Although I wish I could keep you little forever, I look forward to the memories we will make in the years to come. I vow never to take my time with you for granted, and to be grateful for each and every moment I share with you.
Time is fleeting, but my love for you never will be.
I love you, Bubbe!
Forever,
Your Mommy
